12 Last Songs
The work was 12 Last Songs. It started at 12 noon and it ended at 12 midnight. During that time, 600 questions were asked to 28 workers from the City of Manchester. Parallel to this, a performer was capturing, and reporting back happenings around the city, including weddings, community football matches, a group of foresters learning more about fungi, a highly anticipated boxing match … lots of other things happened …… and apart from food at 2pm and rationed as possible toilet breaks, Jen and I experienced every second.
None of the photos are my own btw, (although there is a cheeky selfie from my brother Laurence who was an absolute legend putting us up for 2 nights and added to the sense of belonging… I will use that when I get too philosophical/soppy!) – the whole experience of being consumed by Manchester, being held by Quarantine and meeting with amazing people (from an intense and inspiring conversation to a smile from everyone there), the ‘In the Moment’ feel was all-encompassing.
This burst of colour had me grinning and clapping like a fully engaged 6-year-old. It was a wonderful moment! A punctuation mark in amongst emotional moments, moments of connection, tense moments, beautifully awkward in the moment moments, people having each other’s back moments, profound moments, the still and the chaotic moments, funny moments, deeply troubling moments, but always a feeling of being held well, of support and companionship, reflection and quiet, loud and joyful.
A constant shift of moments, but never rushed, and when there was a gap/silence, it was because it needed to be still in that moment – moments to be human – for the full 12 hours. And lots and lots of questions – questions are good things.
We arrived in Manchester by train and I felt the welcome immediately. Although, on the actual train there was a totally inaccessible ‘accessible wheelchair space’. My standard NHS wheelchair was apparently too big and Jen (creative enabler and co-collaborator) had to stand and try to balance on a moving carriage corridor to help me with food, drink and meds – oh yeah, and my feet stuck out so no one could get past me without much negotiating… It was an interesting practice although sometimes it would be nice to not perform all of the time in public.
Yeah, back to magic Manchester. We black cabbed it to HOME, which is magnificent. I daydream in the bar/café about a Simpsons episode where 4 large helicopters lift a building and transport it to a new town. Torbay needs a HOME.
Later, this space will be bustling with happy and relaxed 18–30-year-old buying pints and looking forward to their night out. Now it is a mix of locals and artists – this space is never quiet, yet always relaxed – it is amazing to think theatre goers and culture seekers are together with the local nightlife vibe, totally undermining the perceived hierarchy of ‘The theatre’s not for me’. There is a cinema and art gallery as well as two theatre spaces, a casual but high-quality restaurant and the spaces in-between. It was always busy, it was remarkable. I imagine how this is achieved, this hopeful gathering of generation and community – the place? the people (who were all friendly and interesting)? the design? or a combination of all three??? The atmosphere was way beyond expectations, filling me with hope!
Not long after, my musing was halted by a cheerful Quarantiner…and then another… and then another… all smiling and warm. They all found time to say hello to us and a small bubble of acceptance, no more than that, of family, began to grow and grow. Through my Another Route fellowship, I’ve been fortunate enough to be placed under the expert and caring guidance of Quarantine, initially for their international experience, but in reality for so much more. They have brought work to multiple festivals, venues and communities and are so giving, it’s not only like tapping into a wealth of knowledge but being guided and gently pointed to the bits of wisdom that would be most helpful at the most appropriate time. We even got invited to lunch with three very busy, yet externally totally calm producers.
There was such synergy between Doorstep Arts and Quarantine in the way they hold space and make you feel part of something bigger. A few months ago now, Doorstep were grappling with the question around ‘what is quality’?... and I think this was an embodied experience of quality… putting people in the space first and staying calm and true to values when it is all too easy to lose them in the frenzy and chaos of production week. To say Quarantine were swans – emitting calmness whilst kicking furiously under the water – would be a total understatement. I remember watching Sarah from Quarantine writing yet another note on her hand and trying to puzzle out about four different problems, but still having time to put her arm around a colleague and take a minute to listen. Beautiful people seem to make beautiful work – end of reflection, that is the answer folks!
The amazing people conveyor belt continued with Steve from SICK! Learning about the organisation was so ‘sick’, seriously inspiring. SICK! has done a lot of work around process, equality and using art and culture to connect people beyond toxic narratives of disability. Their work challenges and shakes society by the scruff of its neck, and for them to make the time to talk to me and potentially be interested in Squeeze Box was incredible!
Just when we were beginning to digest all the possibilities Steve had laid before us, Kevin from HOME said hello. Again, we were just so humbled by how supportive everyone was amongst the prospect of many of them having to prepare an epic 12-Hour durational the next day. Kevin talked through all the ways HOME engaged with artists and community. He was interested in Squeeze Box and spoke about how the work could end up at HOME. I began to well up a little at the kindness, generosity and empathy – 12 Last Songs hadn’t even begun yet – god knows how I got through the next day.
As you do, we arrived 1hr early for this durational. We got the feeling that at least one person there hadn’t gone to bed since we saw them yesterday, but the smiles and excitement were evident. We exchanged a ticket for a wristband and entered an art gallery, turned performance arena. From that moment, there was barely an empty audience seat… even to the point that someone actually sat on Jen!!! She was very calm and dealt with it well – it was the kind of atmosphere where people felt comfortable sitting close, but maybe not this close.
Each worker was so giving and it brought home just how much people do in their day to day, to care, to find pride in what they do. Although it was a durational piece, as the ending came nearer we both felt like calling out ‘Noooo, I’m not ready for it to end’. We’d become so invested in this mini-society that we needed to see more: maybe see resolutions to issues or just bathe in the beauty of their work a little bit more… but then the 600 questions were exquisitely reread in a climatic zen-like trance, a comfort blanket, but at the same time probing inner thoughts and reflections to take away… and the closing was perfect with 1 last song.
This was the first time, well since a long time before the first lockdown, I felt truly part of a community – 12 Last Songs was a home ……….